Regine hated grocery shopping, especially on Saturdays. The store was a battlefield of grumpy shoppers and ill-behaved kids. She clutched her list, determined to get in and out as quickly as possible. Just as she reached for the last box of her favorite organic granola, a hand snatched it.

"Hey!" Regine turned to see a woman in pristine workout clothes, looking like she'd never broken a sweat.

"These are gluten-free, right?" The woman's voice was sugary and insincere.

"Yes, but I was here first." Regine felt silly arguing over granola, but it was the principle of the thing.

The woman's eyebrows arched. "Well, I need them."

"So do I. Put it back."

"Look, I don't have time for this. Don't you have anything to do?" She thrust the box towards Regine and sauntered away.

Regine stared after her, then put the granola in her basket. The madness continued: a man at the deli counter complained about the thickness of his roast beef, and a near-riot broke out over Doritos in the checkout line.

As she finally left the store, Regine vowed to shop at ungodly hours if it meant avoiding the weekend crowds. At least she had her granola – a small but satisfying victory in a world gone slightly mad.