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About This Author
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Each Day Already is a Challenge
A Texas Sunrise
 
A friend, William Taylor, took this picture. He visits Surfside Beach with his dogs almost every morning, watching the sun rise while the dogs prance about at the water's edge.
This is only about ten miles from where I lived in Lake Jackson, Texas. Sadly, I only visited this beach about four times in the six years I lived nearby.
Each day is a challenge. A challenge to get by without thinking about the fibromyalgia pains. A challenge to stay awake when chronic fatigure wants to take over. And a challenge to navigate through fibro fog.
I haven't been writing as much as in the past. For years, I wrote at least 500 words a day. Now, I'm lucky if I write 500 words in month. Sigh.
For more information about what my day (or life) is all about with fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, chronic pains, IBS, depression and everything else thrown in, check this out:
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Grrr. My ears are killing me. No, I don't have an ear ache. It's the outer part of the ear that hurts. I've often said that it feels as if my ears have been frost bitten. It would make sense if this happened after being outside in the cold, but it doesn't have to be so. One could be sitting in a warm and toasty house and have this happen. That's what's been happening the past few days.
Good news about my stomach problem, I guess.
I've been taking some kind of medication for heartburn or whatever it is for about 3 years. The docs have changed the meds from Prilosec to Protonix (expensive) and back again. They've done tests and looked at my innards with x-rays, ultrasounds and MRI's. The only thing they ever find is some mild inflamation. But my whole abdomen is really sore to the touch. There have been lots of things that make me sick almost immediately after eating. And I burp all the time after eating anything. (You don't want to take me out to eat.)
Some have said that it's just my fibromyalgia acting up. Any muscle - including organ muscle - can and does spasm. That makes a bit of sense, I guess.
Then I recently read that as we age, we can make less stomach acid than normal. The meds I take are to reduce excess stomach acid. What if that's not my problem?
The article I read about this said that it's easy to figure out. One only has to take a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar in a glass of water before meals. I decided to try that, and you know what?
I haven't been sick. The tenderness to touch is almost gone. And I think I have been burping less. (We'll have to verify that with hubby.  )
Meanwhile, a new friend recommended something more natural for pain, and since my doc said, "it can't hurt you" I'm giving that a try too. I'll report about it when it's evident whether or not it's made a difference.
Sometimes it's hard to tell if pains are from really doing too much or a flare up of the fibro. I had both a back and knee injury, and those old injuries give me lots of pain as well. I've noticed that even with pain pills and muscle relaxers, some will work on parts of the pain and not other parts.
You know...I never wanted to be a nurse or doctor or medical researcher or anything of that sort. But with most "invisible" illnesses or syndromes, one has to do a lot of research. Most docs - at least those covered by "normal" insurance - are not specialists.
And here in good 'ol Cincinnati, the one doctor who is a specialist charges big, big bucks and does not take insurance or medicaid. Fortunately, most fibro patients in the area have been to him at least once or twice and can pass on tidbits of his treatments.
I'm tired. I'll share more about the world of fibro care tomorrow.
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Last night, hubby said he couldn't wait to read my recap of the pastor's Easter sermon.  He was there. And I know that he even made some of the same comments in the margins that I did. One anyway.
That one margin note that we both made was about nose hairs and ear hairs. No, I'm not kidding. Our pastor spoke about God's great love for us. As he stands at the front of the church looking out, he knows that on Christmas and Easter there are some folks who only come to church then. In some churches, those twice a year church goers are members. In ours, they're probably not. (Our pastor is pretty good about getting members to attend regular worship services, participate in small groups and be involved in some kind of ministry.) So, he was reaching out to seekers, equally or perhaps more than he was speaking to us on Sunday. And that's okay.
Anyway about those nose and ear hairs? He used Matthew 10:30 (NCV), "God even knows how many hairs are on your head" as a reference. And his point was that God loves us so much that our nose and ear hairs are probably included in that count. Personally, I had never given that a thought. I'm not sure if I just assumed that it included those gross hairs or not. But as I sat there yesterday, I know I had to grin when he mentioned them. That's the kind of thought my son would have vocalized when he was a regular church goer. In fact, I'm surprised that he never voiced the question about nose and ear hairs.
Another margin note I made was...Not just oatmeal. That was next to the note about how we don't really have fun until we're connected to God. The pastor was speaking about how God created us with eyes to see the colors and beauty around us, and ears to hear beautiful music. He mentioned having taste buds so that we can taste different flavors...and that God didn't create us to need only one fuel (like oatmeal). (His comparison was to cars, created by man to run only on gas.) He spoke of the fun he has in his life and that persons who are not Christian think we have so many rules to follow that we cannot possibly be having any fun. That's when he said that we don't really have fun until we're connected to God. I think that's absolutely true. 
The only other margin note I made (sometimes I make more notes in the margins than the fill-in-the-blank portion) was, "Jesus changes our want to's."
These were the sermon points:
I know God loves me beause...
 I am God's creation. My response: Let God love me.
I am noticed. My response: Give God my details.
I am built for fun. My response: To live God's plan for my life.
I've got a God written plan. My response: Quit just existing and start living.
I am worth dying for. My response: I will do plan B.
Here, we had to dig out another page buried in our bulletin to read plan A and plan B.
Plan A: I am perfect. I have never sinned. I have never even had a bad thought. I have earned my way to heaven.
Plan B: I am not perfect. I have sinned, and I desire forgiveness not recognition. Today, I accept Jesus' sacrifice for my sins.
As the pastor was speaking about us being God's creations, and therefore truly loved, I thought about artists. I have heard of artists who, having discovered that their works of art were about to be sold for so much less than they were worth, purchased them back themselves. When you think about it, that's what God did for us.
The Bible tells us that, "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23.
lt also tells us, "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23 NIV
Jesus paid a hefty price for us. Sinless himself, he paid the price for our sin.
God, the Artist of us all, surely didn't want his handiwork sold too cheaply to Satan. So He bought us back at quite a high price, showing that in spite of our flaws (and believe me, He knows them all!) we have such a high value and worth to Him. Because He created us, He knows what we are capable of doing. He knows what plans He has for our life. He knows our gifts and our passions and our talents. It must grieve Him tremendously when we ignore them or use them unwisely.
God has given us such a wonderful gift. Salvation. Eternal life. Some have chosen to never accept the gift. Others have received the gift, but have never really opened it. Not entirely. They've peeked inside and ooowed and awwwed over the gift, then tucked it away in the box again. Isn't it time to get that gift out and really examine it? Get to know it? Experience it? Share it???
Toward the end of our worship service, each one took a nail and hammered it into the cross. What mixed emotions that act gave me. Yes, there was relief knowing that my sin has been taken away. But there was also a bit of shame in knowing that I helped place those nails myself into the flesh of my Lord.
Jesus gladly died for me, though. And my reaction should be to be thankful. I am! My reaction should be to discover my purpose, my own God-written plan. And my reaction should be to follow that plan.
Won't you join me?
Easter - to me - represents the real beginning of a new year, each and every year. It is a time of new beginnings. Of renewal of faith.
And of remembering that I am a special part of God's world. And so are you.
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