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Wild turkeys strut around the local library parking lot. Sometimes, people feed them. They're not afraid of humans.

It was such a sunny day. I was sitting in my car, my windows rolled down, waiting for my son to come out of the library.


Fifteen minutes went by. A lady came.out of the library doors, a turkey fell in line behind her, followed her onto the lawn.

She hadn't noticed, until she stopped and turned toward the parking area. She waved her arms.
"Go away. Shoo!"

The turkey merely pranced around. This time, the lady turned on her heel. Now walked at a faster clip. Unfortunately, the turkey did the same.

Suddenly, she darted forward, and sprinted, like she was on fire, across the parking lot, screaming and zigzagging all the way, with the zig and zagging turkey in hot pursuit.


Om seconds, other turkeys noticed. They join the chase, zigzagging and making gobbling sounds. Obviously, they're thought the one in the lead had found food.

The lady narrowly escaped into her car and drove away.


Several minutes later, other groups of people also came out the library doors, but the flock of turkeys had found thier way back and were still recuperating from their loss.

I picked up my magazine to kill time. There wasn't anything too interesting to read. When I looked up, I saw my son exit the library. He scanned the parking lot for our car.

A turkey noticed my son.

I thought, Run, son, run!

He seemed to read my mind. He saw the turkey draw closer. He screamed off and on like a banshee, and ran for my car. It reminded of one of the Sims in the Sims game, screaming and running when their hair caught on fire.

The car door flew open, he jumped in, and slammed it shut.

Meanwhile, I rolled around laughing so hard I could barely speak. Nothing prepared me for something like this.

"What's wrong with you? You didn''t even try to save me!"

"I'm sorry for laughing, son. There wasn't anything I could do."

"So you'd really let me be attacked and killed by turkeys, and watch while they pick me apart, bone by bone?"

"No, of course not. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't attack you."

"Pretty sure?"

"Relax. They were just hungry. and thought you were foo... I mean that you had food."

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